"How To Fix Your Boyfriend or Girlfriend"

I'm often asked, "doc love, I am interested
in dating this girl but she's . How
can I get her to change so that she will be the
perfect girlfriend?"


Here's my answer: In most cases, if
you can't stand something about a person, you should
not get involved in a romantic relationship with
them. (I am not talking about tiny things. I am
talking about big issues.)


As a dating coach, I have worked with many men
and women who had married a person with flaws because
they thought they could "fix" the person over time.
Some of these clients even took on fixing (though they
usually call it "supporting") the person as their
personal mission.



I feel sorry for these men and women!


In my experience, you cannot make a person
change. Ultimately, it is up to the person to change
themselves. Any kind of external stimuli you put on
a person to make them change will lose its effect
over time.


In other words, don't expect your mate to
change much from the way they are right now. What
you see is what you get. Because for most people,
it is almost impossible to break away from their
old habits - especially if the person is past 30.


Of course, this does not mean that a person's
behavior can never change. Just don't EXPECT it to
change.


If you really like the person, then take the
person for who he or she is. But don't try to change
the person even if you know it's good for them. You
can try, but you will probably fail!